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HYpocrisy rears its ugly head

My sis is currently in a crisis involving her new bf, his ex, his ex's friends, and their mutual "friends". I understand the concept of family (specifically cousins), friendship and all that jazz, but what I don't understand is how people have problems minding their own business.

And there comes a time in everyone's life where a situation will test your mettle and you will see who your true friends are. I know, I've been there. I'm used to people smiling at me and stab me in the back the moment I turn around, at people giving me icy stares because they don't have the balls to confront me face to face, of people sending me anonymous hate text messages (only to find out later that the sender was sitting right in front of me). She's not. I can only sit and listen with frustration as she confesses to me the betrayal and the hurt she feels when her "friends" refuse to listen to her. How they subtly drop insults. How they suddenly act cold and distant. How, in the name of family, one of the people she considered her friends, sends hurtful and hateful messages dripping with spite and contempt, calling her a bitch. What I would've said to this person (whom my family knows well, since she and my sis go way back in high school) was: How dare you. After the countless times my sis dragged your drunk ass out of trouble to keep you from hurting yourself. After my sis kept mum about one of your deep, dark secrets to keep you from getting kicked out of school. After she defended you in front of me and my mom when we told her to stop hanging out with you because you were a loudmouthed, attention-seeking nuisance who won't shut up and is most likely a bad influence. And stop acting like you're the cleanest, most virtuous person ever when everybody knows exactly how many guys you've slept with. Oh, wait. Scratch that. Nobody probably knows because we've all lost count.

And to the people who send anonymous hateful Friendster comments and self-righteous text messages: Fuck off. Because if you can only say these things to her while hiding behind the face of anonymity, then you are cowards who don't deserve the time of day. If you have something to say (aside from "..you bitch.. God is good.. He sees everything..") then why don't you say it face-to-face? Other than that, you're a complete waste of time. This has nothing to do with you SO BACK THE FUCK OFF. And another thing: why don't you find something better to do other than meddle in other people's affairs? This ain't your fight. Go home, sit down, shut up, and mind your own business.

The only thing I can probably get away with saying to The Sister is:

1. He better be worth it.

2. Keep your chin up, look them in the eye, and NEVER give them the satisfaction of seeing you affected.

3. Keep your true friends. You know who they are. Everybody else could piss off.

4. Do not lose your focus on the Boards.

5. Above all else, this, too, shall pass.

Sadly, this is one of the moments where I can't step in and interfere. This is HER fight, and I have to let her go through it, no matter how ugly it gets. The other sad thing is I've known most of her "friends" for half their lives since they go way back, and I can only hope they know what they're doing, form their own opinions, and make the right decisions. As for everything else, whatever doesn't kill you only makes you stronger. Life goes on.


( 3 comments — Leave a comment )
Oct. 15th, 2008 01:36 am (UTC)
You're making the right call. This is one of those situations where your sister has to get pissed off and start fighting her own battles for herself. Once that fire gets lit under her, no one else will push her around again.
Oct. 16th, 2008 01:51 am (UTC)
Thanks. It's hard and almost painful to sit by and watch her get beaten up verbally and emotionally, but I guess it's the only way she'll learn.
By the way, I haven't visited interracial in a while because some of the comments were so narrow minded and infuriating that I felt I needed a break from the community. You're one of the few people who actually make sense and provide truthful insights. Thanks for the posts.. :)
Oct. 16th, 2008 01:53 am (UTC)
Thank you and regarding interracial. You've missed what happened.

One of those narrow-minded members finally got booted from the community for his antics:

( 3 comments — Leave a comment )